At a press conference that raised more questions than answers,
Regulatory bodies have expressed 'mild interest' in the development, which in tech industry terms means absolutely nothing will happen for at least five years.
"We are incredibly excited about this paradigm-shifting innovation that will redefine how people interact with technology forever."
— Someone who definitely works here
Key takeaways:
- The technology exists primarily in PowerPoint form
- Investors have been assured it will 'scale massively'
- Engineers are reportedly 'figuring it out as we go'
- Customer support will consist of a single FAQ page
- The terms of service are longer than the Bible
The company plans to roll out the feature to all users by Q3, assuming the lawsuits don't pile up too quickly.
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